We have neighbours. It's a new thing. When you live in an apartment you pretty much live in your neighbour's lap, but still there's not much interaction. In the House it's very different. We have neighbours to the left and to the right and right across and from afar. And we meet and greet and exchange pleasantries more or less daily. And they are all so nice! So friendly, so kind, so funny. And we feel so lucky, having heard many stories of the terror of Suburbia.
But here's the thing. Everyone, from dearest friends to parents to co-workers, says the same thing: You don't want to be too friendly. Not get too involved. You'll soon get tired of them. You don't want to have their children running around all over your house.
And when we reply that maybe we do, if not all the time, they all look at us like we're the biggest fools on this planet.
Yesterday the kids and I ended up next door. The sun was shining, the kids were playing and there was blueberry/coconut (no, it was good!) cake and coffee. I was happy. It was lovely. And I kept wondering if maybe, somehow, I have turned into the most naïve person on earth.
So now I need to know, is this a Swedish thing? The whole don't-get-too-close-approach? Because I'm having a hard time listening to the voice of reason here.
Leo is with me on this one. But he is American. Does that explain it all, or am I taking the easy way out? Let me know what you're thinking.
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6 comments:
I think getting to know your neighbors is lovely. Growing up, we always knew our neighbors. My family would throw big parties, and the whole street would come over. I remember one time when we went on vacation, our neighbor friends watched the house like a hawk, watered our garden, mowed our lawn... it was good to know someone was looking out for our house while we were gone.
As for now, my apartment complex tries to get the residents to know each other - they have parties and try to stir relationships among the residents. Right now, B and I are just getting to know our neighbors, but I think like any person - the more you talk to them the more you know if they are the type of person you want to be friends with. I think if they are nice, and you enjoy their company - then go for it!
By the way, that blueberry coconut cake sounds YUMMY!
Something tells me that you're the ultimate neighbour, Dionne. All those teacups poolside! And cake. Bliss.
I live in an apartment for now... two weeks and I will be in my new home (just purchased my first!) It is bitter sweet. I hate living in the apartment, the girl down stairs is always complaining... my music or movies are to loud, my dogs paws are scraping the wood flooring. you move your chair when you get up..blah blah blah. I get this from her all the time.
BUT I do love my neighbors who live in the houses on my block. They invite me to porch sittings (friday night drinks) weekend bbq's, birthday parties, 4th of july parades, it is fun and we have such a great time. They are so kind and considerate, last summer one of the women on the block was admitted to the hospital for rare form of leukemia ... we all got together and made a big basket of items {dvd's, robe, slippers, lotions, lip gloss, music, drawing materials, stationary... everything she could need} for her (she could have any human contact for 2 months. yes, a glass bubble)
I will be moving away and I am sad to leave this fantastic neighborhood, hope to stay on the email list to come and join the fun.
I am nervous to meet my new neighbors..... will update about that soon.
callie
ps
that cake sounds yummy!!!
You know, I've been thinking about this one...I really have. I think it's great to get to know neighbors, but I think it's important to be a little careful, too, especially with the immediate neighbors. In my experience, sometimes you "click" with them, and sometimes you don't. If you do, awesome! While living in Minneapolis we were fortunate enough to get along well with the 4 other tenants in our building...we'd have barbecues together, go shopping, go to the park. I loved it.
I think as long as you feel good about your fine. :) You'll know if you need to pull back a little. :)
jag älskar mina grannar! Get close! Mitt i allt är dina barn där och leker järnet och du är gräsänka och behöver gå till Bea. Sånt gillar jag!
Hello Anna! I've been wanting to e-mail you to say thank you for all of your encouragement, but nasty blogger doesn't allow me to just reply to comments...so Hi! and Thanks!
And, if you've been reading, you know how I feel about neighbors. I can't imagine what my life would be like without mine. Support. Joy. Wine.
All the good stuff.
Take care, and thanks for reading.
tara
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